


I Am Teaching Myself How to Be Free

by TheSofterGentlerMe



Series: The Lyrical Anthology [1]
Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Post-Season/Series 05 Finale, The Lyrical Anthology
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-31
Updated: 2020-05-31
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:33:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,696
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24472825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheSofterGentlerMe/pseuds/TheSofterGentlerMe
Summary: What happens after you've defeated the evil empire, confess your love and have it returned, find that happily ever after, but something still feels wrong?
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra), catradora - Relationship
Series: The Lyrical Anthology [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1767634
Comments: 8
Kudos: 126





	I Am Teaching Myself How to Be Free

“Concentrate on your breathing and find your center, that’s the only thing that matters right now,” Perfuma said. “In, hold, out, hold, in, hold, out, hold, find your center.”

Catra followed along and felt herself drifting into the rhythm. It was always a fight at first to let go and move into the meditation for her but if it was one thing she knew it was a fight and this one was worth doing. She listened to the rhythm of her breathing and relaxed into it. 

“What are you doing?” a voice said from behind her. “Wasting time as usual I imagine.” 

Catra shuddered and turned, the well known voice killing any chance she had of meditative peace. As she turned to confront the voice she realized there was a bright blank void behind her, slowly crawling her way and obliterating the landscape. She leapt to her feet, her tail bushing out in fear as Shadow Weaver leaned out of the void. She was half covered in deepest black outlined in crazed lighting as she reached towards Catra. 

“Come with me child, it’s your proper place,” Shadow Weaver said in her low voice she used when she thought she was being kind and understanding. 

Catra tried to turn and run but was bolted to the spot and felt the scream rise in her throat as Shadow Weaver’s hand almost touched her face. Right before the hand touched her she suddenly was able to move and then realized she was sitting upright in bed, all her hair on edge. Her heart was slamming in her chest so loudly she was surprised that Adora, asleep beside her, didn’t wake up. Her eyes automatically scanned the room, lit by a single dim light, looking for danger. When she saw nothing wrong, she did it again because her senses still screamed that things were off. And then again. And then again. Finally she realized what she was doing and started breathing deep and telling herself there was nothing wrong.

The room Adora and her shared on the Mara’s Dream was sparse with a few keepsakes carefully laid out on a small table to remind them of home. She remembered when Bow had come up with the name for the old spaceship after a party while they’d talked late into the night about leaving on their interstellar road trip. 

“Sea Hawk says it’s bad luck to have a ship without a name and I’ve been thinking, maybe it should be Mara’s Dream. This was her dream after all wasn’t it? A universe at peace?” Bow had said. Catra remembered all of them in the Best Friends Squad falling silent as they thought about it and without a word they knew it was the right name. With no formal ceremony, they asked the AI Darla if it was OK and when the AI appointed herself captain of the ship from then on the name stuck. She wasn't sure but Catra thought that Darla had a bit of pride that she wasn’t just a ship anymore but the head of the ship she was a part of. 

Catra had loved those first days of peace after the fall of Horde Prime. No one across Etheria had seemed to sleep as they realized the war was over and parties had broken out across the world, and word had it, the universe. They’d moved from one party to another on Etheria as everyone wanted to see She-Ra and give their thanks and celebrate in their own way. The world had seemed to sparkle for her like it never had. Catra was full of happiness as she had everything she had ever really wanted. Adora was by her side and Catra had admitted her love to her and Adora had loved her back and what more could she possibly want? Adora and her had held each other’s hands everywhere as Glimmer jumped them from party to party. People had been thrilled to see not only Adora, because how could they not Catra had thought, but also her. It was such a change and she had felt delightfully disoriented. 

She remembered one time she’d pulled Adora close to her during a dance at a particularly boisterous party and gave her a kiss and someone had noticed and raised a glass in a toast and shouted, “The kiss that saved the world!” The cheers had thundered through the room and Adora had pulled back with a blush but also with a laugh that matched Catra’s as the band had shifted up in tempo and the dancing and cheering carried on stronger then ever as Catra pulled her back in for another kiss. She remembered a flash of light and she was suddenly above the dance floor as Adora spontaneously transformed into She-Ra and pulled Catra up with her as she got taller. There had been a crashing moment of stillness that always seemed to come with the transformation and then the noise had rushed back in like a solid wall of sound as the party screamed in rapturous approval. 

Now in the silence of their room Catra smiled at the memory. She sat back against the wall and watched Adora sleeping. Those had been good times. Then, like a thorn hiding in a beautiful lawn, her inner voice chirped up,  _ But you remember don’t you? You better not forget. Better to be ready then be blindsided again. _

And she did remember. It had happened when she’d been standing with Melog on the prow of Sea Hawk’s latest boat that had somehow managed not to catch fire yet. They had been on their way to Salineas and Sea Hawk had insisted on sailing them there in grand style instead of having Glimmer just hop them in. Sea Hawk and Bow had been singing shanties and Catra remembered that she could almost hear Mermista’s eyes rolling even while she smiled with her arm around Sea Hawk. Then they’d rounded a rocky point and in the late afternoon sunlight they had seen the Salineas Sea Gate shining and sparkling in the sunlight with beautiful multicolored banners caught in the wind. 

Catra suddenly remembered the last time she’d seen the Gate. It’d also been from the deck of a boat but that time Hordak had been standing by her side as she led the Horde towards conquest. She remembered how proud she’d been, filled with fierce anger and what she’d thought was joy as they knocked the Gate down and she’d helped raise the red flag of the Horde over the arch. She’d thrilled at the conquest and at that moment she’d thought she was getting everything she’d ever wanted or at least everything she’d ever dared to admit to wanting to anyone. She thought she’d never be happier. 

Then watching the Gate in that moment from Sea Hawk’s boat she knew that the happiness she’d felt at the conquest had been hollow but the crushing shame she felt now wasn’t hollow at all. It filled her like water and she felt like she’d choke on it. Melog went from being almost lion sized to small enough to hold in a hand in the blink of an eye and started weaving back and forth around her leg looking up at her. Catra picked up Melog and holding them tight to her chest as she tried to not show emotion she quickly turned and went below. Someone on top must have noticed because not long after Adora showed up to find her curled up with Melog in a bunk. 

“Catra?” Adora said in a hesitant voice as she placed her hand on Catra’s shoulder. “Bow said you suddenly came rushing down here. Are you ok?”

Catra felt the old urge rush up to blow off Adora, to put up the cool front and say she had just felt seasick, nothing to worry about, everything was good, but she could feel the warm touch of the woman she loved on her shoulder and she knew she couldn’t hide herself from Adora if she wanted to have the life she was just now daring to believe could happen. 

“It’s…,” Catra started to say as she choked on her emotions that were flooding in. 

“It’s Salineas. I remembered the last time…,” she managed to get out before she broke down crying. “I can’t go there! They’re going to hate me! Why wouldn’t they?” 

“No!” Adora said as she slid into the bunk beside Catra to hold her close. “No, they’re not. They know what you did after. They’ll understand. The other towns have been welcoming, remember?” 

“But I directed most of the conquest from the back, I didn’t walk into those towns at the head of an army! It’s easy to forgive when all you remember is just a faceless Horde soldier or a bot, not the woman… who smiled and laughed… while the town...,” Catra said and trailed off into tears. 

Adora held her, slowly stroking her back and let her cry. Catra felt a small knot of fear begin in the middle of her chest. Her inner voice quietly said,  _ Selineas is just going to be the start. She’s going to remember just what you are, what you’ve done, and she’s going to leave you. What makes you think you’re so special? What makes you think you deserve this happiness? _

“Don’t go,” Catra whispered between her tears.

“I’m not going anywhere,” Adora whispered back as she kissed the top of Catra’s head right between her ears and pulled her in closer. 

“No, don’t go to Salineas. Have Sparkles jump us somewhere else, anywhere else but don’t go to Salineas,” Catra whispered urgently back. “Don’t… don't make me go.”

Adora stopped stroking Catra’s back for a moment and in that moment Catra felt the knot of fear grow and stab at her. She knew that Adora was going to choose her duty to appear for the people over Catra and that would be the beginning of the end. Adora would hear about the invasion from those who’d suffered from it, she’d hear about the destruction, she’d see the scars it’d left on the town, and she’d begin to hate Catra just like Catra always feared would happen. After that she knew it would only be a matter of time and she’d be alone again but even worse this time because she’d have known that delirious happiness of having been together with Adora the way she’d always hoped for before losing it. 

Then Adora sat back and touched her hand to the side of Catra’s face and looked deep into her eyes with a smile, “If that’s what you want we’ll do it. Do you want us to go back to Bright Moon? There’s probably hardly anyone there right now so you wouldn’t be running into a lot of people and even if there is we can always hole up in my room, no, OUR room, and just… well, be.” 

Catra sat in stunned silence for a moment, eyes wide. “But no, wait… people are going to want to see She-Ra…,” Catra stuttered out. 

Adora gave her a quick kiss, “So? They’ll see her another time. Mermista and Sea Hawk will be there and if they need their cute couple fix Bow and Glimmer will be along as well.”

“But why?” Catra asked. 

Adora leaned her forehead against Catra’s and sighed a contented little sigh. 

“Because I love you. Because we jumped through fire to get here. Well… me metaphorically. You literally,” Adora said with a little grin. 

Catra laughed as she gave Adora a playful push. They could hear Glimmer making a lot of noise walking down the hall towards the cabin, the sure sign she thought they were up to something and wanted to give them plenty of notice instead of just popping in on them. 

“You should see the crowd out there!” Glimmer shouted down the hall. “I think the whole town is on the dock! Come on you two, we’ll be docking any time now! Let’s get out there!” 

Adora looked at Catra with a smile and said, “Glimmer you can just come in here. It’s fine!”

Glimmer popped in next to the bunk and said, “Come on you two! There’ll be plenty of time to rest later! We gotta go!” 

“Glimmer, actually I need to ask you…,” Adora started to say.

“Did they haul out giant puppets like Elberon did? Or let me guess, nautical theme? Giant dolphins?” Catra said quickly, cutting off Adora. 

“Just come up and see! It’s wonderful!” Glimmer said before jumping back out. 

“Why did you stop me?” Adora asked. 

“Because… I… I need to face this. Promise you'll be there for me?” Catra said. 

“Of course. Just like you said, whatever happens, I’m staying with you,” Adora said. 

Catra remembered her words as she sat in silence in the ship and listened to Adora sleep. She’d stayed right by Catra’s side when they saw just how right Glimmer had been. The crowd on the Salineas dock had been immense. When Adora had stepped out into sight of the crowd with Catra at her side they had cheered. The party had been one for the ages, something people would remember for their whole life, just like the others had been. 

But Catra had spent the whole time almost glued to Adora’s side. Everywhere they went the little voice said,  _ You remember that spot. It was on fire last time. You thought that was delightful, made a joke about cooking ration bars over it to one of the soldiers. At least it looks like they rebuilt, no thanks to you.  _

Or it’d whisper, _ See that person over there? You can see in their eyes they hate you, just like Adora will. Adora will too you know, if she doesn’t already. You’re living in a lie. A great big lie and it'll all fall apart soon. You drive everyone away, remember? _

She’d argue with that voice, screaming in her head for it to shut up. Early in the evening she’d tell Adora she was going to go back to their room and Adora would nod and immediately go with her, no matter what was going on. Catra would try to tell her to stay, to have fun, and Adora would just shake her head, kiss her and smile and they’d go. 

Finally it was over. They’d stood on the dock with Glimmer and Bow and waved one last time at the cheering crowds before Glimmer had jumped them out and back to Bright Moon. That was when they all finally slowed down and the day-to-day pace of regular life started to reassert itself. They had councils about the road trip, spoke with Entrapta talk about working on Mara’s Dream, listened to Castaspella and Micah talk about just how you’d bring magic to a place that didn’t have it anymore but sometimes Catra and Adora would instead spend whole days by themselves in their room, sleeping, talking endlessly into the night, and getting to know each other again all over. It was during that time that Catra really noticed the network of scars crisscrossing Adora. 

The Heart of Etheria Override had worked but the First One’s word had been branded across Adora’s chest. There were scars across her back from Catra fighting her while under Horde Prime and every time she saw them she felt guilty even though Adora told her it wasn't a big deal, that it had only hurt a little until she’d transformed and then it’d healed over to scar tissue in a split second. Others were older, from training in the Horde or other fights Catra had only heard about that had happened when they’d been on opposite sides. 

Still, those had been good days. They’d cried together but the laughter had been more plentiful. They spent an entire day arranging the room just to their liking. They’d watched the dawn break from their high balcony after having watched the night fall from the same place more than once. The little voice hadn’t come out at all. They were slowly growing from an I to a We.

Sleeping became hard though. At first Catra thought it was the room was just so full of stuff or that the bed they shared together was just too soft and full of pillows. Then she thought maybe it was the lack of noise at Bright Moon or the light coming in from the windows when the moons were high. Then one night she woke up panting from a nightmare and she realized just what was going on. In the quiet night the voice returned to her head.

_ Thought a few days playing house with Adora would fix it? She fixed the world but let’s be honest, you’re screwed up WAY worse than that and the First One’s didn’t leave some magical word behind to fix YOU,  _ the voice whispered. 

“No,” Catra whispered out loud. “No.”

“What?” Adora said, voice heavy with sleep. “Catra? Are you ok?” 

Catra started at the sound of Adora’s voice out of the dark. “I’m… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you up.” 

“It’s OK,” Adora said as she laced her hand into Catra’s. “Can’t sleep? I had the same problem when I first started sleeping here. I never did get used to the bed really. But they don’t have any cots large enough for both of us and there’s no way I’m sleeping on my own.”

Catra smiled for a split second before saying, “It’s not the bed. Well, OK, it probably is the bed partly but I’ve been having…,” but she found she was having a hard time even admitting it.

“Nightmares?” 

“Yeah,” Catra said. “I had just been waking up uneasy and I didn’t really think about it, probably didn’t really want to think about it, but this one, I guess… I guess I remembered.”

And she did. Green light, Horde Prime’s cultured voice, the Horde clones chanting, and pain, so much pain. She found herself stroking Melog’s head as they placed it on the bed beside her. Her other hand held tight to Adora’s hand, not wanting to let go, wanting that anchor to what was good in her life. But her eyes were downcast, she didn’t want to look at Adora right now. She didn’t want to throw one more burden on her. 

“Me too,” Adora whispered in the dark. 

Catra looked up and saw Adora with tears starting to drip down her face. Catra wanted to ask her what her nightmare had been but she was afraid she’d tell her and it’d be something that Catra had been involved with. Instead she lay down beside her and pulled her in close with Melog growing larger and curling around behind Catra, a shield against the outside world. They cried in the stillness of the night and the voice crept in,  _ See? You know that nightmare was about you or she’d have just told you.  _

Catra tensed and suddenly she thought,  _ You fought your whole life for something you didn’t really want. Now that what you do want us right there, you're not going to even try?  _

Catra pulled back a little and put her hand aside Adora’s face. “Do you… do you want to tell me about it? If it’s about me, I understand but…,” she said as her courage fled. 

Adora wiped at the tears on Catra’s face and said, “No, it’s not about you. I have dreams about you but they’re not nightmares.” 

Catra felt her face go hot with a blush as Adora continued. 

“But they are about the war. And well we were…,” she faltered to a stop.

“Yeah… we were…,” Catra said. 

Silence reigned for a moment and during that moment Catra wasn’t sure she drew a single breath before Adora said, “But we’re not now. Catra, I love you. We’re going to have problems, I know we will but I have to believe we’re going to make it.” 

And Adora began to tell her what had happened the day she’d almost died in Catra’s arms. Adora told her about the vision she’d briefly had of them together in the future and then Horde Prime suddenly appearing before her in the vision. 

“He told me it was a beautiful wish but that I had no future and then I heard your voice calling out for me. But in the nightmare we continue on but then suddenly all of this is gone. I’m still trapped in that wish hearing Prime’s smug voice as my friend’s die one by one and I never got to tell you how I felt and we never have this,” Adora said. “And it tears me apart… no, I’m sorry. I know how much he hurt you, I shouldn’t put this on you…” 

“Hey, no, no, don’t do that, please, don’t dismiss this. Don’t be the hero with me. Be Adora. That’s all I’ve ever wanted. You can tell me these things. The world can have She-Ra, they can have the hero, and that’s their loss because I have you. Just be you, please,” Catra said. 

“Then you do the same,” Adora said. “You’re right, we don’t have to be heroes for each other. We just have to be us, the two Horde kids who promised to have each other's back. And I will, always and forever.” 

“Me too, always and forever,” Catra said as she kissed Adora. They’d gone to sleep curled up together. 

Realizing she wasn’t going to go back to sleep, Catra quietly got out of bed and kneeled down next to Melog. 

“Will you stay here? I don’t want her to wake up alone if I’m not back yet,” Catra said. 

Melog replied back that they would and once again Catra wondered why she could hear them but everyone else couldn’t. Giving the creature a hug before Melog lay down beside Adora’s side of the bed she padded out of the room looking for the galley. She could hear Glimmer in the command room of the ship and steered away, not wanting to talk. She remembered the first time she’d been aboard the ship, when it was still a wreck out in the Crimson Waste. It still caught her by surprise to think that this was the same ship and that they were flying between worlds in space aboard it. 

_ Ah, the Crimson Waste. Another time you thought you were happy. Just like now. Don’t worry though, you’ll screw it up cause you always do,  _ the voice quietly said. 

Catra’s tail twitched in annoyance as she stopped for a moment and took a deep breath. She knew that if she paid attention to it, she’d spiral down so she did her best to clear her head before she went into the galley. Entrapta had been involved in stocking the ship for the trip and Catra was glad she had been because that meant there were tiny, perfect looking cakes in the pantry that were perfect for late night snacking. Picking two she climbed up onto the table and sat cross leg on it. She straightened her back just like Perfuma had taught her and as she did she remembered the first day they had gone to see her. 

“Come on, Adora, I don’t mind talking with you about this but come on, Perfuma?” 

“Let’s just go see her then,” Adora said. “We haven’t seen her since right after, well, you know, and we’re going to be leaving soon for who knows how long. Please?” 

“OK, OK, just stop making that face at me. You’re too cute,” Catra laughed as they kissed on the way out of their room. 

At breakfast with Glimmer and Bow they talked about how they were going to go out and see Perfuma. 

“Oh, that sounds great! Frosta mentioned Scorpia had been out there with her. I guess the two of them are talking about re-doing the Fright Zone into something less Fright and more plant,” Bow said. 

At the mention of Scorpia, Catra choked just a little bit. Scorpia had been so understanding after everything Catra had put her through but Catra still felt bad about it. She knew Scorpia was really good at seeing good in people and forgiving but the thought of running into her almost made Catra call off the day. 

“Call if you’re going to be there long would you? Maybe we can jump out later for dinner,” Glimmer asked. “I’d go along but I’m spending the day with Dad.”

“And he’s stopped eating bugs as of yesterday,” Bow said. 

“Bow, just because we haven’t seen him since yesterday doesn’t mean he’s stopped, just that we haven’t seen him do it since yesterday,” Glimmer said. 

Bow pulled her into a hug and said, “But he could have stopped! You don’t know until you see him!” 

“You’re right and you know what? I’d feed him a huge bowl of them myself if that's the price to have him back,” Glimmer said with a huge smile. 

After breakfast, Catra knew she had to go through with it. Glimmer had said the right thing and hadn’t even known it. She should be happy she could go see Scorpia at all. So after breakfast Catra and Adora climbed aboard an old Horde skiff that Bow had been tinkering with and went out towards Plumeria to find Perfuma. They found her happily helping a village rebuild their town square with a huge tree in the center. Catra looked around for Scorpia, hoping she’d see her but also hoping she wouldn’t because while Scorpia had let everything be water under the bridge Catra still felt like she couldn’t let go of it.

As they circled looking for a place to land, Catra noticed several other skiffs lined up in a meadow close in to the town. She saw Adora suddenly tense up, just a split second, before she loosened up and smiled back over her shoulder at Catra. 

“I’d say that’s a good spot,” Adora said. 

After Catra sat the skiff down and turned it off. She looked at Adora and said, “Why’d you tense up when we saw the skiffs?” 

Adora laughed and said, “Me? Tense? No, no, I didn’t.”

“Adora, come on, you’re a terrible actor. And if you suddenly weren’t I’d know it wasn’t you and Double Trouble was impersonating you. So please, tell me?” Catra said as she took both of Adora’s hands in hers. 

Adora sighed and said, “I’m not used to seeing them like this. Normally if I showed up somewhere and there were Horde skiffs….” 

“It meant trouble,” Catra said. Adora nodded without saying anything. 

“It’s OK, I understand. One day I’ll probably be able to see Glimmer doing sparkles without flinching,” Catra said. “I guess we should talk with Perfuma about that help.” 

They leaned forward and touched their foreheads together. Then they heard Perfuma come running into the clearing shouting happily at them.

“You came! You came for the first circle!” Perfuma shouted at them as she grabbed the two of them in a huge hug.

Catra laughed as she was crushed together in the hug. “Scorpia really has been giving you hugging lessons!”

As the hug ended Perfuma said, “Well, you know, she does give good hugs.” 

“Are you blushing!?” Adora said with a laugh.

“Yes! But enough of that, I’m so glad you came for the circle!” Perfuma said.

Adora and Catra both looked at each other and then back at Perfuma. 

“Uhhhh, we came here to see you but we didn’t hear about a circle,” Adora said.

“Oh, well you’re here now so the universe must have nudged you into the right spot! You should come! It’s starting soon!” Perfuma said.

“OK, slow down,” Catra said. “What is it?”

“It’s a healing circle. Scorpia said a lot of the old Horde soldiers are having trouble getting centered and finding a new path so I’m going to start helping them!” Perfuma said. “I’d really like it if you’d attend. We’ll have mediation, we’ll talk about our feelings, we might even do some drumming!”

Catra almost hopped right back onto the skiff at that point but Adora said, “We’d love to. That’s kind of why we came out. We’re having issues ourselves and we thought maybe you’d help.”

“See!? I told you it was the universe getting you set in the right place! Let’s go!” Perfuma said. 

They followed Perfuma down a path into a grove of trees with a firepit in the center. Around the pit were logs shaped into comfortable chairs. Seated around the circle were fifteen or so ex-Horde soldiers. The talking ceased as they walked into the circle and all eyes turned towards them. Catra’s first thought was that they were looking at Adora. That’s usually what had happened at the various parties they had gone to but then she realized they were all looking at her. She felt her ears flatten back and her tail twitch as she got nervous. A few of them that were closest to her stood up and Catra tensed. Then they started to move down in the circle.

“Here you go, Force Captain,” one of them said with a friendly smile. “Got room for you right here.”

It was then that Catra realized they were all smiling at her. She gave a half smile back as they sat down and said, “I’m not a Force Captain anymore. And thank you.” 

The rest of the circle went well. Scorpia showed up right after it started in the early afternoon and it went long into the night. Catra found talking with them felt good. Even Adora, years out of the Horde even before the end of the war, got involved in the talking. With Perfuma quietly guiding the conversation and heading off unhelpful conflict in advance there was hard talk but it was talk that needed to be said, there were tears, a few of the soldiers including Scorpia talked about issues they’d had with Catra and others talked about issues they had with each other or trying to fit in to a society they’d been trying to destroy just a short time before and while it hurt they could tell it was the beginning of healing. 

And there were good times too. At one point some of the soldiers told funny stories about Catra and Adora roared with laughter while Catra blushed and others talked about the bond they still felt with each other. They ate dinner around the fire together, all of them remarking on just how good the food was although one said she thought a red ration bar crumbled up would make a perfect topping to a salad she was eating.

Towards the end, as the conversation was trailing off into silence as each person looked peacefully into the flames, Perfuma stood up and said, “We're going to close the circle soon but I just wanted to say something first We’re all full of things that can trap us and that hold us back. We close ourselves off and let negative energy imprison us but we don’t have to be our own prison guards. We can let ourselves be open, we can teach ourselves how to be free.”

As the fire died down Catra and Adora left back up the path in warm silence, hand in hand, towards the skiff. Several of the former Horde soldiers had set up tents for themselves and Catra noticed next to their skiff one of the Rebellion’s tents was set up. It was a measure of how the day had gone that they didn’t feel it was out of place to see the two styles near each other. Then they realized that they hadn’t set up a tent, that they hadn’t even brought a tent with them. They listened at the flap for a moment before quietly entering the tent. Bow looked up from his tracker pad as they entered. He and Glimmer were curled up in a beanbag chair with her asleep on his shoulder. 

“I’m sorry we didn’t call,” Adora said. “But why did you come out any way?” 

“Well, we thought we’d surprise you but when we got here, we saw the skiffs and went down the path a little and saw everyone and realized that it probably wasn’t for the two us,” Bow said as he set his tracker pad down. “And I had the tent stashed in the storage of the skiff so I figured we’d get it set up in case you wanted to stay.” 

“Thank you. It’s been a good day but it’s also been a long day,” Catra said as she saw two cots pushed together against the back wall. She crawled into the one against the back wall and Adora crawled in behind her to drape an arm over here Catra barely managed to kiss her goodnight before she was out. 

They spent a week there, Glimmer and Bow jumping in and out as Glimmer ran the kingdom, Catra and Adora spending time with Perfuma and Scorpia, talking and meditating and helping with the rebuilding of the town. Some of the former Horde members stayed on as well helping with the rebuilding. They worked well together Catra noticed. Their training was getting put to good use finally. 

Back on the ship, Catra was finished with her snack and sat still and quiet on top of the table. The little voice came creeping back into her head. 

_ Well their training was put to good use but what use have you put… _

“No,” Catra said out loud. “I must be worth something. My friends see it. Adora sees it. I may have to teach myself how to be free for the rest of my life but it’s worth it to be the person Adora sees. And if you disagree with her, well you and I are going to have problems even if you are my own inner voice."

With the voice silent, she went back to bed, curled up next to her love, and slept a quiet dreamless sleep.

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Let me say before I get into the note thank you for reading my little work! 
> 
> While I've written for myself for years this is the first time I've ever written fanfiction. When I told my wife I had the urge to do so she encouraged me to go for it so I have many thanks for her. The next is to the crew of She-Ra for creating such a great show full of so much joy, sorrow, and triumph. Finally, I want to say that I plan to write more stories that overlap with this one. The plan is to do continuations of this but also other characters that we've seen and OC interacting with the world that exists from the show all with the timeline jumping around, so you could have one story timeline running concurrent with another, with the only rule I'm imposing for time frame in the show being post-Season 5. My few other rules will be that it will be for general audiences (so no explicit sex or graphic violence), I'm going to try and have each work be inspired by a lyric (this one was, a lyric from Various Storms & Saints by Florence and the Machine), and I'll keep going as long as it's fun for me. That's it! Thank you again for reading and I hope you stick around for the next one.


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